Lesson 15 - Giving and Receiving, Both are a Gift

For as long as I can remember I’ve really enjoyed giving to people. I find much joy doing things and helping people, and I absolutely love to give gifts to those around me.

Many years prior when a co-worker asked if I gave so often to people to get them to like me? I remember being completely furious with her. How dare her I thought, to even insinuate that I gave or did nice things for people, for any other reason than for altruistic reasons. The truth of the matter was she hit a nerve. When I thought about it later that day, I realized she was partially correct. I actually did enjoy giving to people, and received a great source of pleasure from doing so; however my friend was correct that I also desired people’s approval of me. 

Thinking further on the subject, I recalled a number of my close friends over the years complaining that I rarely just accepted gifts and treats from my friends without much hassle. After deep reflection I realized there were a bunch of issues going on for me. One was that if I took gifts, or praise from my friends that they would come to think of me as using them. Also I felt if I took anything, I’d owe them. Of course this was and is entirely not true. My friends love me and do not expect me to give them anything in return for the gifts they give me. There is the other issue though I realize, of self-worth. For much of my life (till just recently), I did not feel worthy to receive.

The greatest lesson in all of this that I’ve learned over the past couple years, is to accept gifts from people. Whether they be friends, family or co-worker, is a great blessing to both parties, both the giver and the receiver. I’ve been utterly blessed with wonderful people in my life who love me, and now I’m fully able to accept their gifts as well as give to them. Having been able to let go of my insecurities, and give and receive wholly has significantly enriched my life, and those around me. Giving and receive completely has brought more blessings and abundance than I could have ever imagined.

Now when I obtain a gift, a thank you or praise, I accept the wonderful gracious gift, and simply say: Thank You. :-)

Lesson 14 –There is ALWAYS Enough

Back when I first moved out in my early 20’s, I seemed to live on almost nothing, but I always had enough. As I got older, and desired more things and had greater expectations, it was then I discovered I never seemed to have enough. In my early 20’s, after the bills were paid I generally had $10 a week for food, and $5.00 left over for fun. It was tight, but I rarely felt broke. Sure there were times I wish I could go out to dinner, or get a nice outfit, but commonly I just did not focus on what I did not have.

When I hit my early 30’s and started making  decent money for the first time, it was then, that I started to travel, buy nice clothes, and eat out a great deal more. I’m amazed how many times in the recent past I’ve felt bummed, when I didn’t have money to take that trip, go out with friends or just buy that nice something or other.

It was then that I remembered what my early 20’s was like. There was no need to spend money to enjoy life. Sure, it’s gratifying at times to buy that item you have been eying for a while; On the other hand, life can be just as much fun doing things that do not cost a penny. Like taking a pleasant stroll in the park, or playing with your pet. I’ve even found it cheaper and more enjoyable to have my friends come over. I cook a little something, perhaps they bring a bottle of wine or desert, however at the end of the day we all spend mere dollars instead of dropping $30-$50 on an evening out.

So, I guess if I had to sum it up, what I really learned is the 'I'm lacking', mind-set is merely a state of mind.  I now make an effort to focus on all things I do have and all the blessings God continues to grate me daily.